A personal online journal of truth.

Just Beachy

It’s been a sweet and sour week of fun in the sun.

A beachy time

Me, my family and my guy friend, along with his son vacationed together for a week in Garden City, South Carolina. Oh the beach was glorious and all the mommy-son time was magical! These sweet things will be dearly missed, however there was a sour side to the week. You know it, the guy friend! Of course, the vacation was planned months ago and at that time I was optimistic about this relationship. But as time passed, the lack of chemistry became undeniably obvious to me.

Therefore, as this vacation comes to an end so shall this relationship. It should have ended a month or two ago but with the reservations made and the deposit paid in full, it would have been very difficult to throw a break-up in the mix. Nonetheless, the concoction is sour and must be exposed. So, here I am, riding down the freeway in deep thought regarding breakup techniques. It is so difficult to be honest in a situation like this. I don’t want to hurt his feelings but I don’t want to drag it out any longer either.

How have you broken it off in the past when the other one is still interested?

He’s just being a boy!

Son, put the gun down and step away very slowly!

Uh! Scared you, didn’t I? No, my son is not a serial killer. No, he doesn’t have a violent behavior problem. But he does have an interest in guns. Is this an indicator that he will one day have a violent behavior problem? Or is it an indicator that he could be one of those kids who go to school with the intention to murder someone else? No! What this means is my son is a boy!

I recently listened to a podcast about America’s school system today and the zero tolerance policy in place. I wish I could remember which podcast it was but my memory fails me at the moment. What I do remember about it, though, is the valid points it had about the zero tolerance policy and how it is affecting our boys. The example in the podcast was about a teacher asking his students to write a story about something, anything, of interest to them.  One of the students, a young boy, wrote about a terrible tornado which came through his town and leveled his family home, killing all of his family. This young boy was immediately sent for an evaluation due to the violent nature of the story. Why? Did the story indicate this boy was prone to violence? No!

Why are we, Americans, not allowing our boys to be boys anymore? The school system is geared more toward graduating successful females instead of males. We want our little boys to sit still and imagine peaceful, pretty stories. We want our little boys to act like little girls. We are setting them up for failure from the beginning. Boys are more aggressive than girls by nature. It’s that little thing called testosterone!

Perhaps I’ll home school my son.

My son recently turned two years old and what a wonderful birthday party we had for him! It was green from inside out and outside in. Oh, but not just any ol’ green. This was John Deere green! Yep – as in the tractor, John Deere green! It was not as difficult as I had imagined to find such unusual toddler birthday supplies. In fact, I found an extensive collection online at birthdayexpress.com. The most surprising find was a John Deere piñata. That’s right — a John Deere piñata!

To be honest, this was my first birthday with a piñata as well. A baseball bat was used as a last minute, quick thinking tool for swinging at the piñata. It was a hit (pun intended)! All the kids were very excited and eager to take a swing. The adults formed a circle of safety around the swinger for obvious reasons. The smallest children were allowed to take a swing first and as predicted, the piñata broke open with the first hit from one of the older children. Candy littered the floor followed by children’s eager fingers.

I’ve decided this will be a birthday tradition from now on. “Pin the Tale on the Donkey” is old school! We’re going for the big stuff from now on! I just wonder what kind of piñata I’ll be trying to track down next year!

Happy 2nd Birthday to my little miracle, my son! Love Mommy!!!!!

A “Sock Monkey” Winter

A Sock Monkey Winter

A Sock Monkey Winter

It’s a “Sock Monkey” winter at our house this year! My almost-two-year-old son received this darling knit hat from his Granny for Christmas.  Prior to this, my son refused to wear a hat which limited our time playing in the snow. I tried to coax him in many creative and humorous ways but to no avail. I would act goofy wearing my own hat. I offered to let him wear my hat. I tried bribery. I did all but stand on top of my head to convince him that wearing a hat was fun. He was not interested, period. Then along came the “Sock Monkey” hat!

To say that my son loves this hat would be an understatement. He adores this hat. He puts the hat on all by himself. He even wears the hat indoors! This hat is magical, I declare! His enthusiasm led me to learn more about this crazy looking, red-mouthed monkey, called “Sock Monkey.”

Did you know that the Sock Monkey is considered American folk art? Crafty American began making this unusual creature out of socks over 60 years ago. But not just any sock. They used the now patented Red Heel work sock by the Nelson Knitting Mills in Rockford, Illinois. The town in fact is still known as “The Home of the Sock Monkey.” The town even hosts an annual “Sock Monkey Madness Festival.” This coming March will be their 9th festival.

Although Fox River Mills has taken over the Nelson Knitting Mills, you can still make a classic sock monkey from their patented Rockford Red Heel® socks. Fox River even has the instructions on their website. I’ve caught the fever myself and hope to make my son a classic Rockford Red Heel sock monkey soon. Who would have ever thought that the creation of a simple work sock would lead to so many adorable little toys for children? I’ve read that these sock monkeys were first created during the Great Depression. This confirms what my mother has always told me. “Necessity breeds creativity.”

Trying to fit in at home

I am off work today. That seems like a good thing until it actually happens. It’s difficult to change routines, not just on myself, but on every member of the household. I’m normally up and gone to the office by the time all the others get up to start their day. Then I don’t arrive home until late in the evening, usually somewhere between 6 and 7 PM. I come in right at dinner time. I join the family for dinner; do some basic chores; give my toddler a bath; then it’s off to bed. I spend at most, 3 to 4 hours every evening with my family – not long. So, today, on my day off, I had a pleasant and relaxing day in mind. It has been far from that.

I’m not sure if it’s just the “change in routine” or what, but my toddler has been a living nightmare all day long. Everyone is edgy and it has been quite unpleasant. Perhaps I am dreaming and not being realistic when I long to have a “normal” at home, family day. I do realize that some of this could simply be driven from the fact, I’m not accustomed to the “at home” life. In contrast, I’m most comfortable at the stressful, fast-paced office work style.

I pray the Lord will give me more patience with my family and they with me as we adjust to a full house for a few days.

Happy Thanksgiving holiday time 🙂

Journaling – On or Offline?

Keeping a journal is becoming more and more important to me. I need to record my thoughts. I want to learn from my own past mistakes, failures, achievements. Finally, I want my son to one day read my journals and learn important lessons. This last reason causes me some conflict about the method of choice for my journaling. Right now, I am utilizing WordPress for an online journal. In the past, I have kept handwritten journals. Which of these would my son most likely read? Will he be able to access and see my online journal 20 or 30 or even 40 years from now? What will happen to my WordPress journal when I am dead and gone?

While researching this issue, I found a short but helpful site discussing these same concerns. The post referred me to LegacyLocker.com, a website offering a way to pass on your online property when you pass on. I have not fully researched this service yet, but from my initial observation, I am hopeful it is just what I need. It even mentions passing on my Facebook account. I had not thought of this but yes, I want my son to have my Facebook account once I am dead and gone. For me, Facebook has been a daily record of my life for a couple of years now. It is packed full of photos from the birth of my son to now. He would value this, I hope.

Being assured that I can pass on my online property now leaves me with even more questions. What will become of Facebook 20 or 30 or even 40 years from now? Will my account still be there to actually pass on to my son? How about WordPress? If either of these sites shut down, then what will happen to all the information about my life? Will it all go down with the sites themselves? Is there a way to protect my information if these sites become obsolete? These concerns prompt me to consider reverting back to handwritten journals. I’m just not sure. More research is required.

I received some worrisome news yesterday. My family doctor is referring me on to a cardiologist for an ECHO and consultation. This is because there was some concern regarding my EKG. I’ve worried myself sick since receiving this news but have am now ready to turn it over to God. Why?

Well, first, I sincerely believe and know it can only be left up to God. But second, I have been reading a daily devotional book titled, “Jesus Calling” by Sarah Young. Today, I opened up the book to November 19th devotion and, lo and behold, what do I read? “LEAVE OUTCOMES UP TO ME.” There’s your sign! Could it be any clearer than that? What a great reminder for all of us. We are not the ones in charge. God is in charge of every little detail of our lives. He already knows the outcome. He already has it planned for me. He knows what is best for me. And I am ever so grateful to have Him in charge of my life. A Heavenly Father who guides me and protects me and leads me is the greatest gift I could have ever received. Of course, this doesn’t mean that I can go out and eat my weight in Big Macs. What is mean is that he will give me the strength and knowledge to overcome and fight my battles. He will show me the way. Whatever comes, be it a heart condition, surgery, or nothing at all, He will equip me with what I need.

I am blessed beyond measure this morning just to be able to rest all of worries upon His name. God, please be with me through this day and every day ahead. I love the Lord! In Jesus name, I pray. Amen.

If you are reading this and do not know the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, I pray that you will find Him and accept him as your Savior. There is no greater peace. There is no greater blessing.

I Will Be Your Shadow

”If you’re alone, I’ll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I’ll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I’ll be your smile… But anytime you need a friend, I’ll just be me.”

– Unknown

 

What a very special weekend we had! On Saturday, we packed everyone in the car and went to the park. This might not sound like a great feat but when you are hauling an 81-year-old woman and a 21 month old, it is quite the task. Aunt Gene, the 81-year-old woman, seemed to really enjoy the fresh air and adventure. She had been stuck in the house all week-long and it was a joy to get her out for a short while. She’s doing so good since moving in with us. I was worried about how we would all adjust to another member of the household but my worries were for nothing. Everyone has adjusted easily and she fits right in. It’s a blessing to be able to have her with us and I love that we are a bigger family now.

 

At the park, my son refused to slide or swing or anything besides sit on the bench and watch the traffic go by. He was in an odd mood. Not sure why but he simply didn’t want to play at that time. So we didn’t stay long but left there and went to eat at Shoney’s. After that, I took him to a 2 year old’s birthday party where, again, he was not interested in playing. Well, let me back up. He was not interested in bouncing in the bounce house. What he was interested in doing was playing with the pedal tractor and wagon. This little boy is obsessed with tractors and wagons! Of course this might have something do to with his Papaw having a tractor! Well, he was in luck on Saturday! The birthday boy’s Papaw had a real tractor and offered to take us for a ride. We happily accepted! My son was in HEAVEN!!!! LOL It was a good day.

 

He spent the night with his Papaw and Nana on Saturday night, then I picked him up Sunday morning for church. We tool Aunt Gene to church with us too and she seemed to enjoy that as well. It was a really great weekend!

 

Here it is Monday morning and time for the rat race! But I will not worry about all the problems ahead of me at work. I will rest my mind on the Lord and know that He will enable me to do good work. I’m so blessed and so thankful that I know the Lord as my personal savior. Without Him I can do nothing. I pray that He will guide me and be with me all day every day. God bless all who happen upon these words. Amen!

In the Bible, 2 Samuel 13, one of David’s sons is very sinful. David, himself can trace the sins of his children to his own misconduct. This scares the you know what out of me. I have a son, 21 months old. I have sinned a great deal in my past. I repented. I have been forgiven. But will my past affect my son’s future? Oh, Lord in Heaven above, please say it isn’t so. Surely, my son will not follow in my footsteps. Surely, and with the help of the Lord, I can show him the consequences of my mistakes so that he might make better choices. I don’t want him to suffer the way that I did. I want him to have a peaceful and blessed life, all of his days.

I was studying the Bible this morning when I came across this issue and it is very worrisome to me. I pray God will open my eyes on this subject so that I might be assured there is hope for my son. Does anyone else have anything to add here? Please comment if so.

*****UPDATE: I truly believe that God has forgiven me of my past sins and has blessed me with a new beginning. Knowing this and having faith that God knows exactly what I need, I look forward to a blessed future with my son. God bless all those who happen to read these words.

My Brain Is Mush

I have been in my new job for about almost two months now as an Inventory Planner for a major printing business. I love the position and the challenges of the industry. However, there are some days that simply end with my brain as complete and total mush. I’ve learned all I can learn in one 10 hour period. I must stop and allow my brain some down time. It needs to process what I’ve forced into it today before it is able and willing to incorporate anything else. I have exceeded its tolerance and it’s in shut down mode. In fact, to be sure, I am having difficulty even typing these sentences.

 

Tomorrow, God willing and the creeks don’t rise, I will continue on my journey of “speed learning.” It’s an awesome experience! I had forgotten how passionate I am about supply chain management. I know in my heart that God placed me in this position and I am always thankful to Him for this opportunity. I want to be the best at what I do and I want to give all the glory to God in Heaven above. He is my Lord and Saviour and without Him, I could do nothing.

 

If you are reading this and you do not know Jesus as your personal savior, I beg you to go to Him in prayer and He will save your soul. Through Him you will find the most amazing peace you could ever hope for. It is simply pure joy to serve such a mighty God.

Amen.